L'Embarras des richesses

Two posts in two days (plus a new post over at The Food Blog).

But this post is because I have awesome friends. Friends who reply to emails superbly fast (within half an hour) and are willing to do me massive favors that potentially have legal implications (though unlikely).

So a shout-out to Ms. Dr. Claudia and Hinch, who are willing to serve as referees on my citizenship application. Because I don't have any friends in the immediate area who I've known for more than three years AND I'm not related to AND are professionals (as defined by a ridiculously precise list that's very non-comprehensive), I started scrambling, but those two stepped up. Though Dr. Claudia is not included on that list–despite being a Dr.*–I can use her because she's known me personally for years and is old enough, and Hinch is a member of the British Computer Society, which is on the list.

I've known Dr. Claudia since my time in Leicester cough years ago, and Hinch nearly as long, since he's been The Boy's friend since they were children. So they are most awesome. I could have gotten a professional reference from someone in the US (only one referee need be a British citizen, and that one doesn't have to be a professional), but I'm pretty much limited to one person who I know is on the list, and besides, it looks better if I have friends in this country. And I have very little time to get this done, so posting forms back and forth is a pain.

Believe it or not, I don't have a limited amount of time because I procrastinated (though I have), but because there's about a 12 day window in which I want to apply. I don't meet the residency requirement until March 18, but the application fees–which are already outrageous (£851 at least, plus other fees to be determined)–will most likely go up in April. So I have to get the application to them after I've been resident here long enough, but before the fees go up. Yeah, that's not a precise window or anything.

So yes, an embarrassment of riches for the 3** people who read my blogs, and an embarrassment of riches for me because I have amazing friends.

*Neither medical doctors nor Post-Doctoral Research Fellows are included on the list, despite being very much professionals. Yet Chiropodist, Christian Science practitioner, and Dentist are. WTF?

**I may be overestimating the number slightly.

Get off my lawn!*

I'm not unlike the crotchety old geezer who stares out his front window, shouting at birds and children.** It's an absolutely glorious and sunny day, and though snow is supposedly predicted for Thursday and Saturday (apparently Friday doesn't exist), it's a positively tropical 13.3º C in the house*** and I haven't even put the heat on (yet. I do have laundry to dry). It's almost not frigid outside (7º C), and because Slaithwaite is so picturesque you could vomit, it's pretty perfect.

But I'm grumpy. It appears to be mid-term. Every mouth-breather who thought it was their unalienable right to breed has done so multiple times, and their children are not caged up at school like they should be. Since most of these people appear to be unemployed**** that means annoying family herds are meandering down the sidewalks, stopping and getting in my way. They're feeding the ducks, who are shitting everywhere, walking along the canal ensuring that I can't get past, and generally being obnoxious. They're shrieking and laughing and being loud and happy, and those that aren't are talking on the phone outside my window. And when I'm not getting hit by noise pollution, the smokers are out there, hitting me with toxic crap that I don't want fouling my lungs or stinking up my home.

A lot of people accuse the US of giving kids too much time off from school, and since the summer hols are about 3 months long, I used to agree (yes, even as a student). Until I discovered that my mother-in-law (who works in a school) was home on holiday for a week or more at a time every 6 weeks or so, and the summer hols are 6-8 weeks. I'd like to say I'm exaggerating, but I'm pretty sure I'm not; British kids are off from school at least as much as American kids, it's just more spread out (yes, this is probably better for knowledge retention, but I'm still irritated. Besides, they were just off for two weeks for xmas less than 2 months ago).

Also, this Berry-blast Echinacea tea tastes like ass, and I have 18 more bags of it to choke down. Because you can't just get echinacea, you have to get echinacea and something. God forbid someone doesn't want the extraneous crap. So now my teapot looks like it's bleeding. Since it has a face on it (I didn't buy it; it was a cast-off from my in-laws who gave us a teapot so that we could offer them tea when they came over. Guess how well that worked.) it's more than a little disconcerting.

*Never mind that I don't have a lawn. I barely have space to keep my trash and recycling bins.

**I've done both. But the kids were pounding on my side door. I've also hosed down a tree with a squirrel in it. I don't like squirrels.

***That's 297 inches for non-metric users. Also, that's the warmest the house has been–even with the heat on–since before xmas.

****Because it's not possible that they might work non-traditional hours, freelance, work from home, take holiday, or anything else.

Fits of joy

Yay! I can waste my time on the Internet again instead of getting real work done!

On the other hand, I can actually get some real work done because I have the Internet! Yay!

That is all.*

*The problem, if you care, had something to do with the radio filter or whatever on the line. The BT tech was helpful in explaining what it was, I just wasn't paying much attention. 8:30am and all that. Also, turns out 2 of our DSL filters were shot (namely, the 2 we were using. Thankfully we've been sent something like 7 of them–along with our 4 routers.).

Argh

Our phone line died. Which of course means our broadband is neither broad, nor bandy. Joy.

In other words, I'm at the library, and any hope of doing any work is shot until they fix stuff at home.

Did I mention I'm overjoyed?